I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about it but…

What does it actually feel like – to be in love?

I read that, when you are, you and your soul are in contact. My soul is wafting around untethered? Not so much aimless, but without connection?

I wonder how it feels to be so easy with someone.

The swaying of the gum tree out the front makes me smile, the cat stretched along the windowsill, and the smell of eucalyptus from the oil burner. Life is not that simple. And I’d really like to get a grip on it not just let it roll along unchecked.

Watching a parent slow slide, crawl, towards death, extinguishing your own light in the process. Groundhog days in the office. And parenthood, reignited, flattens dreams and puts them out with the recycling.

The prayer flags flap in the longed for cool breeze sending ‘swift, wish fulfilling’ prayers to the four directions – I don’t send my own wishes on the wind anymore but while I continue on autopilot, I will alternate metta and tonglen meditations before sleep.

 

may all beings be well and happy