Oh wow Ali where for art thou yes I DO have a lot of anger!
Here’s my day.
Trip to the hospital with youngest. Yay we’re supposed to be happy that her test results are all ok so that means next week they can start pumping mouse protein into her, along with the three current toxic drugs, in an attempt to get her body to stop attacking her body. That’s right MOUSE protein. I’ll sit next to her in the day clinic for eight hours while it’s delivered by tube and we’re being happy about it.
Next a stupid phone call from my ex husband who let’s be honest resides on another planet. A planet where ‘let’s plan a week in Europe together’ seems like a statement that won’t be met with what the? Since when do we even talk, until recently about children’s health, and how many years since we’ve been in the same room, same country, spoken face to face but um yeah sure I can picture this vacation you mention. N O T even.
Add a visit from a sibling to discuss mother’s care. That’s forty five minutes of my life I won’t get back, and I can’t add anything to what I’m already doing for mother. ‘Mother is depressed’. News flash I’m heading that way on a good day! Surely we all are at times.
I think that’s all, really. It’s just stirred up again after the retelling to eldest. The explanation as to why we can’t have a weekend away together any time soon though I would love to.
Sometimes I think killing one of them would be a good option. (And I so do not mean my children! you know that right?!) In jail I would be fed, clothed, roofed, and have free medical care til the end of my days. And I could probably garden.
But seriously dear reader do not fret about me – it’s all out now. Better out than in. I am fine. Some days are wonderful. It’s not all negative at all I promise! It’s funny really. And today I am so buoyed by the response to my retreat story – I wasn’t sure I could tell it so to have so many people enjoy it and let me know, is just….well Sally Field territory
(Two readers came from facebook – how does that work?! I’m not connected..must be from someone else’s blog showing on their facebook page I guess)