healthy apprehension

 

What’s on your mind tonight? 

Such a mish mash. 

I’ve spent a lot of today thinking about Ali. I’m going to the dr tomorrow and I’m scared. Wishing she could come with me. Wishing I could talk to her. She never showed me fear. Does the strength come when the hurdle has a name Al? I think she always had it. Misunderstood – vague, seemingly scattered but actually a mature master of calm. A truly reliable friend. 

Then the Philippines are all over the news and I feel so small. Until I have something to worry about how insignificant are my concerns. And how selfish my fears. I ditch the post I was writing.

Click to my desktop and by chance Ali’s smile flashes. Ah I miss you dear friend. So, you will come with me tomorrow, thank you.

 

 

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16 thoughts on “healthy apprehension

  1. Hope you are okay!? Sending healing prayers your way.
    xox

  2. Hold her close. My best.

  3. Hope everything is okay. I bitched about my computer yesterday and then thought, “Hey mag, really? At least 10,000 people are missing/dead in the Philippines and your computer is too slow. Shaddup!”
    xoxox

  4. Those we love, and who love us, never leave us Annie. So glad you’re finding your Ali close by. Hope only good news from doctor! xoxoM

  5. you are in my thoughts. Best wishes.

  6. Yes, our own worries are really so insignificant (when we see the latest on The Phillipines), but it still doesn’t really allay the anxiety if you have it.

    I must admit I’ve been to the Dr so many times, I just find it an irritating interruption in my day, but I do understand your own anxiety.

    How about some deep breathing and a Mindful walk in the fresh air, or some meditation to wash the cobwebs away.

    • Thanks so much for your thoughtful kindness Vicki. I made the appointment for mid morning so that I could meditate beforehand but I couldn’t settle…haven’t been meditating well for a while now actually.

      When I arrived I went to the bathroom and splashed cold water, that helped.

      First hurdle done now, next visit should be easier. I used to be fine, when I did go to the dr more often…I haven’t been looking after myself for a while now so the anxiety is my own fault really. Anyway…small step today.

  7. It does put our petty thoughts into perspective when something like that super Typhoon happens, my heart bleeds for those lost and those left behind.

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