b is for birds – #atozchallenge

 

The doors are open, and you know there is safety on this deck while I’m here. In bone warming sun I’ll just look out to sea, breathing in your whispers as you all fly by.

Ra says I gift your blue to the ocean…you don’t need it. Splash your orange and red, and soar higher. Light up the sky for me, little rainbow ones.

Cockatoos choose when to share their hidden magic yellow. Take us under your wonderful wings.

Sing the tune the world expects to hear…and then fly this way. I will always keep your secrets (just ask Ra).

 

a is for adult – #atozchallenge

The family of three moved out yesterday. I’m an adult and I can cope with the spaces where their things were, the spaces where their words were.

I have advanced qualifications in silence – no problem there. It’s funny though, when there is physically nothing there is so much to clean. I have cleaning to do – dusty acres of timber floor, and dusty recesses of my mind. Clean up my act, make a life plan for one. I’m an adult, I already told you that right? So…I can do this. No white noise, let my thoughts assemble in an orderly fashion.

gettin’ old

ah my bones are aching, my joints and/or muscles…is it this, is it that, is it ‘just’ old age?

my glasses need bumping, one ear is less interested in hearing you…

and today, when I looked at the referral the doctor gave me for a 24hour blood pressure monitor test all I saw was ’56 year old’

I’m going through some sort of crisis and it’s not middle age my friends! (marbles intact so far)

a day like any other

 

Today was a day like any other. Any other during a heatwave that is. Meaning – air con on and stay where you are!

So, I was trawling social media…and a post popped up in a support group I follow and the day took an intense turn. A young woman asked if the amount of medication she had on hand was enough to end her life. What an amazingly wonderful group of people – all living with a chronic illness, often misunderstood and dismissed – delivered a constant stream of messages until we were sure she was safe. A paramedic from another state tried to get someone to her home. Someone from her actual city offered to go to ER with her. Kindness screamed from my screen and overwhelmed me with joy in the midst of such sadness. We are all connected.

There’s a whole team, unseen, walking with her now. So glad she reached out. She spent the afternoon at the hospital, went home with antidepressants and therapy sessions set up and a collective sigh of relief went round.

Tonight, I saw a tv show I’ve never heard of before – Henry Winkler and William Shatner were in Tokyo. Laugh? I did 🙂

Intense day – strangely good start to the week.

state of the nest

 

I’m feeling a little lost today friends. It’s been a strange old life.

My eldest has been on maternity leave for ever…and my youngest was between jobs. Today they both left the house all corporate and happy. And I had nothing to do, nowhere to be, no one to talk to. I didn’t know I needed a plan day one.

It was the first day of school after the long summer holiday all over again. Other mothers couldn’t wait for the holidays to end, I wanted them to go on and on. I like my babies close. Is it me who didn’t grow up while they did? The nest will empty and I’ll still be bringing treats home, looking for the 3pm smile and hug.

 

 

aussie summer

 

The sea is choppy, the whales have moved on. And summer burst through the open back doors with hot and stinky humid day one weather. Tradesmen and neighbours out of hiding. The old lady, unseen for days and I was just beginning to worry, out on her deck with a hammering, sweeping handyman. A bunch of shirtless young guys the other side, with unsociably loud music and foul mouths, varnishing long planks of timber.

Christmas preparations in the air. Game on!